Off track

I want to turn my back on the world

Go back to being a girl

These expectations of how life must be

Is sucking the life out of me

 

The rules so ancient sometimes without a place

Is forced painstakingly into this revolving space

I’m worn from moving in and out of this mess

Like a woman drained from the periodic discharge of her uterus

 

I want to drive far from these pleading eyes

Guilt-trippin’ me into giving away what is mine

On every corner of my life it seems to me

I’m obliged to indulge those who buried theirs under its debris

 

I need to discard this custom-crafted cargo

Custom-made for lost people to live lives borrowed

Consumer-minded bargain hunters of fixes we art

We plaster and paint our fermenting holey hearts

 

I want to rip off this ignorance of what’s right

Fight this mute culture, be contagious with this gripe

Disinfect our words so we can say what needs saying

Do what needs doing, do away with docile obeying

 

When death comes we pray and party away

Part with pain, we give pain, we get it back again

Life carries on, we anesthetised it at birth

I’m turning my back on this world and going back to being a girl

 

This scares me more than anything I’ve ever done before

But I’d rather bleed and heal and brave this cold war

I’m fighting for the return to my ability to transact

I expect confusion and denial ahead but fuck it, I’m off that old track

off track

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